I Should Stay In England

Click the gif

sharmuta:

Me after one shot

My professor giving us murder tips
  • Professor: Always strangle above or below the hyoid bone, to hide the cause of death
  • Professor: When you're doing your killing

cleffairie:

i feel like once you were emo in middle school youre low key emo for the rest of your life, like you could be 20 in the middle of college wearing uggs or whatever but once you hear the first key to the black parade/i write sins/sugar we’re going down you sprout an imaginary fringe and start yelling your lungs out like its 2007 all over again

capsicle107:

inarina:

aryashi:

supagirl:

hargitays:

why don’t tv writers realize there are better storylines than cheating and death

season one, they had me take archery classes ‘cause i was really particular—my dad uses a bow and arrow and i was particular about wanting to do it correctly, cause i feel like you can always tell when there’s a girl, an action girl, and she’s running and you’re like ‘she never runs’, so i wanted it to be correct. and also, she was supposed to be in the olympics for it, so she was, you know… i do know how to do it, maybe not the best but i know how—like, the basics.

the-butt-prince-ike:

scienceisbeauty:

This is a classic `nude calendar´ when you extract everything which transparent to X-Rays, i.e. all the flesh, and therefore any remaining sensuality.

Via Tha Mary Sue: “This Exists: X-Ray Pin-up Calendar

tye-dye-dreams:

teachmehowtoglovie:

EVERY TIME


OmG

tye-dye-dreams:

teachmehowtoglovie:

EVERY TIME

OmG

theladypipsqueak:

salparadisewasright:

theladypipsqueak:

MY MOM DECIDED THAT SINCE I FUCKING HATE CLEANING THE LITTERBOX FOR MY DUMB CATS SHE’S ACTUALLY MAKE ME A FUCKING LITTERBOX CAKE. THIS IS A FUCKING CAKE. THOSE ARE SLIGHTLY MELTED TOOTSIE ROLLS. THOSE ARE LOTS OF COOKIE CRUMBLES. BUT IT LOOKS FUCKING REAL. I ATE THIS IN A RESTAURANT. I RECIEVED WORRIED STARES FROM OTHER PATRONS AS I FEASTED UPON FUCKING CAT POOP. MY BABY SISTER REFUSED TO LET ME EAT THE TOOTSIE ROLLS BECAUSE SHE WAS ONE HUNDRED PERCENT CONVINCED IT WAS POOP, SHE RIPPED IT OUT OF MY HANDS AND THREW IT BACK IT THE PAN.

"SISSY!" SOMEONE WAS LOOKING ON HORRIFIED AS SHE GRABBED THE DISTURBING LOOKING CANDY OUT OF MY HAND. "DONT EAT POOP SISSY!"

a li tter box cae k„

congratulations on turning 91

thanks

verylittlebird:

kids today google, not giggle. they play angry birds instead of getting angry AT birds. they all have an ipad but no iq. not even one. they playstation but they never play station. i.e. one pretending to be a train and the others pretending to be different trains or low paid maintenance workers. they’re obsessed with one direction, rather than enjoying all eight directions equally. facebook… but unable to face… a book. or a hoop with a stick. a lost generation. the tv show.

gothdetectivesagency:

(x)

chrissieakers:

fabled-foreigntongues:

secretobama:

cirk-urk:

That guy in the lower left corner in the crowd remembered every move 10 years later. 

is that ryan gosling 

thats fucking ryan gosling

It’s back

chrissieakers:

fabled-foreigntongues:

secretobama:

cirk-urk:

That guy in the lower left corner in the crowd remembered every move 10 years later. 

is that ryan gosling 

thats fucking ryan gosling

It’s back
"I’ve said this a million times: there should be no limitations on comedy. Anything you wanna fucking do - do. But it should be “why do you want to?” When you learn someone’s story, you might not want to. You still can, but you might not want to. If you really learn what a transgendered person goes through, how scary it is, and how brave they are - you might go “you know, I might wanna make fun of the people that make fun of them.”"

Todd Glass, CBB 290 (via dancingwithleland)

We’re very excited to see Todd Glass perform in Wilmington later this month. Here’s one of the reasons why.

(via pineappleshapedlamps)

prguitarman:

confessionsofmadonna:

squeakyfoam:

fuck you I hate you

How did I not see this coming?

How dare you

pineappleshapedlamps:

prguitarman:

Uh

When lifehacks go bad.

pineappleshapedlamps:

prguitarman:

Uh

When lifehacks go bad.